I am ready to die. Plus an apple tart recipe.

Two bomb threats, one evacuation, and a last dance taught me that I am at peace, yet there is so much more I want to do.

“Vivaldi, Four Seasons. Fall? No, spring. Ehhh let’s dance this one”

I convinced Anh to dance with me in the warm underground market at Columbus Circle. Two violinists and a cellist were playing one of my favorite songs, and I was supposed to be taking a break from tango for the night to let my ankle rest. I thought I had found my perfect excuse for my daily dance, but it got even better when they quickly switched to Piazollas Libertango. In head to toe black, and Anh in a business suit post-work, it was a very New York City moment. After dropping in some money we happily bounced away to pick up some apples and a basket full of ramen (for my sister’s dormroom…) in the Wholefoods of the Timer Warner Building. We had apple tarts to attempt later that night.

After adding a bit too much ice cream to the cart, we headed towards checkout. As I stopped to look at the flowers near the bottom of the escalator, we noticed a blinking red light coming into the building. Seemed like police lights. There was some chatter and we asked if everything was okay. Apparently it was, and we looked at each other and decided to checkout as quickly as possible just incase. Because ice cream. In light of the recent bomb scare a few days ago (for which I was on a train right under the area that received the warning) we started talking about if this really was the end of us…

At that point I realized I had just listened to the most beautiful music played in front of me live, got to dance with a dear friend, and that no death bed apologies or regrets crossed my mind. I just told my mom I loved her when she called to make sure I was getting the correct kind of ramen for my sister. She knew where I was, so if something did happen, my family would know I was there. I am proud of what I accomplished so far in my life, and even more proud of how I did everything- with integrity. I am happy with the kind and honest person I have become, and while it would suck for this to be the end, I have no regrets. I am happy.

We got onto the line, I quickly grabbed my favorite Tom’s tooth paste (peppermint for the win) and we talked a bit more about life. With two customers in front of us we were told to leave our carts and groceries and evacuate as quickly as possible. That’s when we knew something was really wrong. We walked away, but I ran back for my coat I stashed under the cart (possibly not the smartest idea) and we quickly headed for the escalator. The Whole Foods employee in front of us grabbed the knee walker scooter of the woman next to us, and we helped her onto the escalator. He told us he forgot his hat but he doesn’t even care. He was still wearing his uniform. After getting her back onto the scooter we all dispersed and Anh and I headed quickly to 66th street. I could only imagine the mayhem that would be the 59th street station.

It started to really sink in that something bad may have happened. In New York City it would not be out of the realm of possibilities. With the recent shooting in mind, we really don’t know when we will meet our end. Yesterday I did hot yoga and had lentil soup. And I realized all of the lentils in the world wouldn’t keep me healthy enough if I were to be affected by a disaster. So my point is be healthy, but healthy also means mentally and emotionally healthy. No, that Halloween candy won’t derail your diet completely. I did not regret one slice of cake or all of the nights I chose dance over sleep.

To end on a happier note here is my apple tart recipe:


-Package of puff pastry

-Apples (4ish?) I like Granny Smith and Gala for variety

-1 egg


-white and brown sugar



1. Defrost the puff pastry according to the instructions, and then preheat the oven to 400F closer to cook time.

2. Peel and thinly slice apples. I cut the rounds in half and gently fanned them. Set aside.

3. Lay the puff pastry over a lined baking sheet and score the the sides about half an inch in to make a border. Fold up the sides.

4. Brush with egg wash? (One egg beaten) I found that my base was a little soggy and it may have been due to the eggwash. At least brush the sides.

5. Layer in the apples and brush with butter. Sprinkle on sugar.

6. Bake about 12 minutes or until the sides are golden brown

7. Enjoy with ice cream


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